Being happy inwardly is more important than showing you are happy to others. Don’t get me wrong, happy people are fun to be around – we all prefer to be with someone who is happy over someone who is grumpy. But sometimes, the people who seem the happiest are miserable on the inside. Which do you prefer to be – truly happy or only appearing to be happy?
Sometimes it looks like other people are so happy. You look at them and wonder, what’s their secret to happiness? Have you ever met a family who seems to have it all together? When I was younger, there was a family just like this. They were perfect. Both parents were successful, nice looking, and fit. Their children were brilliant, beautiful, talented, and athletic. They went to the best schools and had tons of
friends. Everything seemed to come so naturally to each of them.
And then, things started to crumble and in a matter of months it all ended. The marriage was over, the children were no longer successful in school, they had to sell their house and start over. Their carefully orchestrated and perfect life was a facade. It was never perfect and when it started to come apart, it came apart quickly.
When people seem happy, but it’s only for appearances, it can’t last. In order to be truly happy, you need to be happy on the inside. Just looking like you are happy is an empty victory.
So many times people believe that the “if onlys” will bring happiness:
If only I liked my job….
If only I had a new car…
These will bring happiness, but it will be short-term. True happiness can only come from knowing and accepting who you are, changing the things that need to be changed, and going forward. Sounds simple, right? Well, it isn’t hard but it does take time and effort.
Take a moment to think about those things about yourself you want/need to change. Understand that not everything is within your control to change but some things are. Figure out which is in your control to change and then select the one that is most important to you right now. What actions will you do to change this?
Here are some tips that may help you make a change. You can follow any, all, or none of these and add some of your own as well. Do whatever works best for you. The most important thing is that you make a consistent and conscious effort to make the desired change:
- Write down your goal, including a completion date: “By March 19, I will…”
- Write down the steps you will take to make this change.
- Remind yourself everyday of your goal to change. You can do this by setting an alarm on your phone or taping a note to your mirror. You can even say the goal you wrote down in Step 1 aloud.
- Every so often, re-evaluate your steps to make this change and add or remove any steps.
- Celebrate your successes!
(Photo Credits: StartupStockPhotos / Pixabay